by B.J. Delas Armas on 4/28/2004 03:10:00 AM 0 comments Print this post

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The Cosby Show Theme Song. . .

The third version of it, all 51 seconds of it. Message me, and I'll give it to you. It's the best piece of music combined with a tight introduction for everyone of the characters. I always wonder where those characters are nowadays.

It starts off with a cool, tapping, bass or drums or whatever it is and is dependent on its trumpet for the duration of the song. It goes duhduhduhduhduhduh :insert trumpet playing jazzy tune: dun dun dun dun dun, and officially kicks off at the 8 second mark where they introduce a dressed up Phylicia Rashad/Claire Huxtable and her youthful but experienced attractiveness in a sleek black skirt or something with her name suddenly appearing in white characters like Presto Mr. Clean as if she was selling her name or it was revealing some kind of answer for a TV game show.

Where is she now: I don't know, but I doubt she's a MILF anymore now that she's up for social security in a few years. Probably doing something important anyway.

Then Sabrina Lebauf/Sandra Huxtable, a mulatto girl with short curly hair, and a businessy-but-not-really-businessy black and light pink mini-skirt and coat appears to ask to be banged or whatever as she rocks with that dude who's supposed to play her husband in the show.

Where she is now: Probably banging someone. Or working at a Diner and calling herself "Babs." Or doing something intelligent. In that order.

Then it's Lisa Bonet/Denise Huxtable in long locks right down to her loose white pants. She uneventfully and (seemingly forced) backs into the dude that's supposed to play HER husband. That dude didn't seem to expect it really, he was just having fun, geeze.

Where she is now: Banging Lenny Kravitz, or some other light-skinned bra with dreads. Aggressively.

At this point, the trumpet works itself into a frenzy at about 25 seconds, and unwinds with dunnnnnnnnnndunnnnnnndunnnnnn and climaxes when the budding grown up college guy Malcolm Jamal Warner/Theo Huxtable is inserted holding his coat over his shoulder in a 1989 type of way like he's supposed to be on the verge of something great or the cutting edge of something.

Where he is now: Last I saw him was on that crack-concocted show before "Homeboys in Outer Space" called Malcolm and Eddie. Apparently he was grown up in that show because he was fatter and had short poky dreadlocks. He looked really no different from the last episode of the Cosby Show to when he was on Malcolm and Eddie.

In the middle of this great trumpet climax, the intro cuts to an unsure looking 16-year old Tempsett Bledsoe/Vanessa Huxtable in some unattractive pants looking at the sky and like doing this introduction song is a drag on her time (oh cause she's so important now).

Where is she now: Working at a stink factory where she curls her upper lip to her nose and her job is to say "stanky" all day.

Still in this great trumpet climax, it's a pre-teen-teenish Keshia-Knight Pulliam/Rudy Huxtable in an aqua dress doing some predictable other hip hop dance (that she re-used and half-assed in the last ever theme song of the Cosby Show).

Where is she now: I actually searched and found out that she was one of several other second rate stars to be on The Mole. She looked really attractive. I hope she got rid of that annoying nasal congestion or whatever it was she had during the show. But damn, you'd like to be locked in between her legs. . .when you're carrying her on your shoulders of course.

After that great trumpet climax, and in a softer context with music-painting-her-face introduction, it's baby extraordinaire Raven Symone in what appears to be an aqua-colored little clown suit, and all she does is bop her head and making a pushing motion to the audience.

Where is she now: All I will say about the "clown" is that now, she's very round. And she has some very round friends (actually just that Angel Cromwell who played her cousin) on that Disney show of hers too.

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