by B.J. Delas Armas on 1/05/2004 10:08:00 PM 0 comments Print this post

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The Top 10 Things That Would Probably Kill Me

10. Watching the current Chicago Bulls, Bears, Cubs, and Blackhawks.

9. Driving on a narrow highway. 101, 5, 1, I hate you guys.

8. Watching all the chick flicks ever made such as While You Were Sleeping non-stop (this kind of torture is probably reserved for purgatory)

7. A seriously mentally diseased person with a weapon in hand.

6. Doing something that requires being more than 50 ft above the ground. I've never really liked that Knotts Berry kite ride anyway.

5. Slee. . .slee. . .ping. . .OK just kidding I'm awake.

4. Me backing up into the driveway of my parents' apartment. It's thinner than Calista Flockhart's wrist.

3. The mentally diseased (I think, with its constant whining and bipolar behavior towards me) dog at the back of that driveway.

2. My diet, you the-will-include-vegetables-any-day-now, just-not-today-so-I-could munch-on-this-triple-cheeseburger-with-fries-and-a-kayoke (surfer way of saying "Coke" )

1. My brain and its ability to keep making useless connections that would propogate fear.

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