by B.J. on 4/10/2005 03:38:00 PM 0 comments Print this post

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Super Mario Bros. 3, You Are Officially PWNED !, Says Notorious Delas Armas Clan

After 14 years of getting to the 8th level with the 3 whistles he would acquire every game and never doing anything about advancing past the grabbing hands, much relief has been achieved in the Delas Armas Household.

At about 3:30 on a sunny Sunday afternoon when plenty of people would be outdoors, the two rivals within the Delas Armas household were inside and celebrating their improbable victory over the well-championed video game Super Mario Bros. 3. This was their first victory over the game after many years of heartbreaking disappointment and frustration.

"I never thought that when I was sleeping this afternoon after having had that recurring food coma that always seems to occur on the weekends when I'm at home eating home-cooked meals that I would actually beat this game today," noted Brian J. Delas Armas, gamer for 13 of those years.

Before this man of spunk and temerity heroically slayed the dragon that was Super Mario Bros. 3, he had a vision.

"I dreamed that the Mario Bros game that my sister was playing would never turn off, despite my attempts to unplug the Nintendo. We were stuck in castle-land forever. But you know what ? I had another dream after that. My dad would call me from atop a hill and I would jump up and slowly glide down."

The victory marks a complete gain in the relations within the notorious Delas Armas clan. The two juggled responsibilities when it came down to the last stage of the marathonous game.

"In Koopa's castle I would let Camille get through the flying balls of doom and that since I would have more composure and calmer mindset, that I would take care of the donut lifts. It took about 27 lives but it made a great one-two punch."

While unity and harmony has been achieved in the household between the two parties, that may not last forever. But for now they have something to hold onto.

"I told her that she was Kobe and I was Shaq, cause of course you know how bad Kobe is doing and how high-flying Shaq is, heh heh, but anyways, I told her that like them in the past we'd bring home the non-prize-winning title of video game supremacy within the 8-bit no-memory card video game itself today. And well. . .we did."

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